I have been so busy! It doesn't feel like I am on vacation. But I have gotten a lot done in the last few days. I am done shopping, wrapping, paying bills and cleaning until after Christmas. I have been working at the scrapbook store a little too. I work tomorrow and then I am off until Monday. It feels great to have everything finished. Although I still have four gifts to finish making. I hope to get back to writing and reading more after the holidays.
I want to enjoy the holidays...but it is very hard to keep smiling and mean it. I miss my brother and it's a lot harder then I thought it would be. It's really hard to listen to Christmas music. Every song makes me want to cry. It was super hard shopping for my sister's presents and not buying one for Pete. I think people forget that I am still dealing with his death. I can't help not feeling all Christmasy this year. And I started my period today - that doesn't help my emotional roller coaster!
Gotta go and get some sleep. I am tired and I feel like this post is just rambling. I'll post some pictures and new layouts after Christmas.
12 years ago
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1 comment:
I understand your feelings..trust me. It will get better but won't go away. Hang in there. You will get through. It is still very very new to you. I am still dealing with the sudden loss of my dad and it was 5 years ago. I still tear up. But that's how we hold on. The first christmas is the most difficult. Just focus on your blessings and it will help. I am thinking of you.
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